In the name of love

Stealing a quote from Wayne Brady, I would have to "choke a bitch" if I was stabbed in the ey, not once but twice. Take a guess which country this happened in?

China, again.

Earlier I said China was practically tied with India for weird stories, but they top the list when it comes to contaminated products. Come on now, antifreeze in cough syrup?

A reason to beat somebody

Brace yourself for this article, this guys needs to thoroughly beaten and punished for what he did.

9-1-1 is a joke.

Flavor Flav now has help in ridiculing the 911 emergency dispatch system. A 4 year old in Illi-noise gave Carpentersville deputies a run for their money as she called 911 almost 300 times before deputies fought back using Ronald MacDonald. Unfortunately, the little girl got screwed and another hardened criminal mastermind was born.

Hot and Sour Dragon

I shouldn't be suprised what comes out of China anymore...they give India a run for it's money when it comes to weird news.

Zebrula?

Definitely not the next big budget superhero movie.

We start 'em out young in the South

Check out this kid. He'll be a rough-neck once he hits puberty. Kudos to saving your brother little man, even though it's a bit disturbing.

Gross!

It's been a while since I posted, but I found an article disgusting enough to bring me back. We have all seen the gag w/ some guy getting his Johnson caught in a pool drain plug while being dirty, but real life stuff like this makes me hurt. I didn't know you could get your guts sucked out this way...

Can global warming prevent a new Cold War?

It seems President Bush is tap dancing on a nuclear landmine with Russia. First, talks of putting missiles at strategic locations around the former Soviet Union, then a comment that Russia is backsliding on it's democratic reforms. With the US war on terror in full swing and those two issues out in the open, I'm guessing that Russia probably fears becoming a renewed enemy of the US. I can smell a new arms race brewing, especially when you toss in the now infamous speech by President Bush several years ago.

Rise of the Machines

Like a bad prequel to the Terminator movies, Japan is leading the way to world domination by man-bots.

Vick in the news. Again.

Vick is just surrounded by misfortune.

Best Jail Photo EVER

I have to admit, Paris knows how to work a camera.

Local politics-why do I love it?

Here you go. Enjoy this blurb from an Athens Banner Herald article on congressional candidate, Paul Broun Jr. who was caught soliciting donations in anticipation of former congressman Charlie Norwood's death from cancer:

Broun sent out letters more than a year before Norwood's death stating his
intention to run should Norwood retire or run for governor but Norwood found out
about it...When Broun told Norwood at church that he'd been praying for him, Norwood replied, "Well, as you can see, your prayers ain't been answered, 'cause I'm still breathing," according to [John] Stone.

"Mamaaaaaa just killed a mannnnnnn..."

I'm sure people have wanted to shoot me too when I sang "Bohemian Rhapsody."

Celebrities in the news

Here's the top 3 famous or infamous of the week:
1)Kevorkian is free
2)Lohan is hooked-again
and
3) the Police are lame (aw, so sad-I'm a big fan)

On a side note, this news made me very sad too. I want to have your love child Lee Adama.

The Wall of Weird

A quick run through of my favorite "Top Ten" weird stories I've read this week:

1) A monster pig-again
2) My old friend Nessie
3) a gay AIDS rape gang
4) Scuba diving at the Eiffel Tower
5) Child death by dishwasher
6) A daycare caught hiding babies
7) Dildos and organists
8)Getting high in Rome
9)The dangers of eating at fast food restaurants
10)A very old melon
and one bonus from my favorite country to pick on:
11) India

His house of cards is already collapsing

Uh-oh. I think Michael Vick's already starting his fall. That only took an hour. Let's see what the next couple of days has in store.

I love using the word jet-setter in a conversation

I like to string together random words that would never get used together to describe a person, so this next sentence is dear to my heart. The issue with the jet-setting, TB-infected, personal injury lawyer from UGA (now that's a combination) shows that the world is becoming smaller, it's still easy to sneak into the country, and people can always be expected to do the worst thing possible in a bad situation. This little drama reminds me of 12 Monkeys. If you have never seen it, you should. It may foster an irrational fear of airports, mad scientists, disease, crazy people, and time travel, but it well worth the ride.

Again, and again, and again

Michael Vick has become one of my hobbies now. I just like to see just how much trouble one athlete can get into. I think Vick is in it up to his neck. We'll see how NFL Commissioner Goodell handles the situation since he's been cracking down on the bad boys of the NFL.

Good ole Georgia

We are going to get a reputation if our beloved citizens and associates keep this monkey business up. First there was the fishing guys getting shot at not too far from Athens, then the redneck candidate showdown, and now a UGA Typhoid Mary. How much more excitement can we take?

3 new shows you need to catch...

Extreme Hangover: Home Edition

Extreme Makeover: Vaginal Edition

Extreme Makeover: Poo Edition

Not so Best Buy

Better check twice and bring a copy of the online sale ad next time you want to buy that [insert techno-babble here] when you hit Best Buy.

That is soooo gay.

Military standards have always been conservative, but times are changing. Now, desperate for warm bodies, restrictions have loosened to allow soldiers with more tattoos, weaker educational backgrounds, and even allow "moral waivers" for criminals. God forbid you're gay.